With new query letters, of course, come new rejection letters.
Now, in all fairness, most agents have a pretty decent form letter (see my previous blog about those if you're wondering what they are). There are also the select few agents (or their assistants) who actually take the time to write nice, personalized letters and believe it or not, there is something gratifying about receiving those letters. I got two today...and yes, I know...they are still rejections, but at least I know the agent actually took the time to read my letter and really felt my book wasn't a fit for them instead of...well, the one I'm posting today.
First of all, some of these (fiction-so we're talking finished novels here) agents write back and say they receive hundreds of query letters a day. The irony of the one I posted below is that this particular agent wrote back in thirteen minutes and said the very same thing--so maybe she didn't get quite so many on that day :) Really, though? I mean, how many people have written complete novels and are querying these agents? Sometimes in the same letter, they will say that the industry is in the worst state its ever been (great thing to tell an aspiring author) and things are extremely slow, yet they're absolutely incapacitated because of the amount of query letters they are receiving. Which is it? Are you riding the 2005/2006 housing bubble where everyone wants a piece of the action or did it already burst and you can't give away your foreclosure? It can't be both ways...
The other thing is that aside from the people who I've been introduced to BECAUSE I'm a writer, I've only organically met one other writer (who happens to be my friend's son and I hope the agents pay attention when they get his letter because his book is the needle in their supposed haystack). So if all of these hundreds of thousands of writers with finished novels are out there and they're writing query letters and bombarding the agents with them every day, who are these people and more importantly, where are they? I want to meet them.
In fact, I might have just single-handedly solved this whole debacle! The finished books are out there, the agents are just so overwhelmed by query letters, they don't have time to actually read any of them--ergo everyone gets a form rejection and the publishing industry is tanking. Hmm...maybe I should be a literary agent instead...just kidding!
Anyway, that basically covers the form rejection letters, but this one is a special "gem" and I felt the need to share it. It is probably the best I've received so far.
So, without further adieu, here it is...My comments are in red. Enjoy!
Note: While I do have a sense of humor, I'm not a mean person, so I did block out their name and email address (and mine, too, while I was at it) for the sake of privacy. I apologize for the small writing, that was as big as I could make it since I just did a screenshot with my comments on it.